#19: Appeal to nobler motives.

Sometimes I think you can definitely tell by the wording of these principles that "How to Win Friends and Influence People" was written by Dale Carnegie in 1936!  When I hear "Appeal to nobler motives," I imagine a cowboy with a tall, white hat walking into the saloon... Of course, the white hat tells you that he's the good guy!

When listening to participants' group discussions in our Dale Carnegie session this week, I was reminded of how often people struggle with motivating others.  This week, we were talking about managing stress and several people mentioned the need to motivate others as a source of stress in their lives.  Luckily, they are about to start testing out principles such as #19.  I remember a  Kum & Go (convenience store) manager from a few classes ago sharing his story of how appealing to the nobler motives of his staff worked wonders.  They went from not doing their jobs to doing them quickly and spotlessly all because he took the time to say, "I know you're a hard worker and I know you'll do a good job."  Most people aspire to be seen as good at what they do - so these employees rose to the challenge (this is also a preview of Principle #21 in two weeks - "Throw down a challenge!").

In my own life, my husband and I use Principle 19 with our two-year old son, Tyler, on a daily basis.  "You're a big boy, right Tyler? So let's see you use the potty, let's see if you can eat this big bite of growing food, let's see if you can wash your hands by yourself..."  I can't say we've had the same success record as my Kum & Go friend but Principle #19 works enough for us to keep trying it toddler-style. After all, Tyler aspires to be a "big boy!"

How about you?  Have you appealed to someone's nobler motives lately?  Go ahead - give someone a white hat to wear and just watch how they surprise you.